no sheets=no sleep

It's 11 pm and I'm bored out of my mind. I'm waiting for my sheets to dry, because I finally found those pesky bed bugs and had to change my entire mattress. gross. But I'm glad we found them and now have officially ridded my room of them. I was starting to look like I had a flesh eating disease. I'm supposed to be studying, but just like all my other 17 years of school, I'm not. Studying doesn't do much for me. I learn visually. So if I practice, I learn much better than if I read some outdated, misspelled notebook that some guy put together in an effort to make this class challenging.
I've been pondering today. I've been pretty homesick lately, and for those of you who know me well, you know that anxiety is something I deal with regularly and to an extreme. For those of you who don't know me as well, anxiety is something I deal with regularly and to an extreme, so now you know. My goal when I came here was to immerse myself in my art and to completely enjoy the city and all the new experiences. That is still my goal. But part of enjoying myself here is becomming realized by my total lack of an agenda. Apart from Sunday 10-6 and Monday 6-10, I have absolutely nothing to do. I can plan whatever I want, which includes complete nothingness. I've spent since age 15 working and going to school. After graduating, I worked full time. Now, I only have to account for 12 measly hours of my week. It is ok to spend a day sleeping until 12, reading in the sunshine, painting my toenails 4 times, and watching reality crime shows. I felt a little guilty for not having an event planned every day I wasn't in school, but now, I don't feel so bad. Because part of my fun in being here, is just doing alot of self reflection and enjoying life as is. That's my boredom rant for the evening. I guess I should go read some nonsensical wisdom that's supposedly going to improve my makeup skills now.

No comments: